#3 Something Mischievous

 On our return from Florida I booked in to see the doctor in the first few days back who examined me.  Whilst she couldn't feel any piles she said based on everything I had said and my general wellbeing it was probably a pile higher up with no obvious red flags for cancer.  In fairness to her she said despite this she was going to refer me for some up to date blood tests and a colonoscopy - this diligence may well have saved my life.  She said that she didn't see a need to rush the colonoscopy and the NHS standard wait time of 2-3 months should be fine.  I went to have routine blood tests which all came back normal much to my relief.

In the meantime I spoke to Axa who referred me to a specialist bowel doctor for an initial appointment to approve me having a colonoscopy.  I went to meet the doctor who reinforced what our local doctor had said - based on everything I had told him it sounded like nothing to worry about or he would rush me in the following week.   I felt great in myself, my weight was stable, my bloods came back clear and the blood in my stool was bright red and infrequent which ties in with the symptoms of piles.

His recommendation was for me to have just a flexible sigmoid (i.e. a camera examination of just the lower bowel) but I told him if you're going in you may as well examine the whole bowel for my peace of mind and asked for a full colonoscopy.  He had a conference and some holiday planned over the next few weeks so advised me to book in for a colonoscopy towards the end of July.  When I spoke to his PA I was given a date at the end of July but she mentioned that they did have one slot in the following week (4th July).  The day prior required me to have industrial strength laxatives to 'clear you out' but looking at my work diary I had 7 hours of meetings planned, however a little voice in my head told me to clear my diary and book in asap which I did.

 

The day before I worked from home and had the prescribed dose of the laxative at 7am - over the next 2 hours it did its job pretty horrifically.  You also have to fast during this time so I just drank loads of water to ease the hunger.  The taste of the laxative was utterly vile like drinking heavily concentrated salt water with a hint of lemon and I remember spending the day wondering how I would manage the second dose without gagging!  I also remember thinking how I never want to drink this ever again - wishful thinking ha ha  I somehow forced my second dose down at 7pm by which time I imagine my colon was gleaming and this dose didn’t really do much more.  I slept well and straight through the night. 

 

On the morning of the colonoscopy I drove over to Clare Park hospital near Farnham with Julie who had taken the day off to support me - then she went to take the kids to school.  After reading a great article (link below) about whether to have sedation I took the decision not to have it so I could have driven myself, but decided to ask Julie to drive in case I opted for sedation during.  I recall feeing nervous saying goodbye to Julie and the kids - less so about the actual procedure and more about them finding something. 

 

I went in, got checked in and was sat in my room waiting.  The nurse came in, said 'I assume you'll be having sedation' to which I replied 'no, out of interest why did you assume that'? He said 95% of people have it but from what I'd read from people who've had it un sedated it was fairly ok, and that small voice in my head told me if there is anything of note then I want to be aware of it when I'm told.  I asked him of the people who don't have sedation how many have asked for it mid-procedure, to which he replied in all his time only one has opted for it during - that was enough to reassure me that it would be fine.  They also gave me my meal options for after the procedure which I couldn’t wait for as I hadn't eaten in 36 hours.

 

A little later than planned I went in to meet the doctor - he explained that whilst in Clare park 95% of people have sedation for colonoscopies in his other hospital in Frimley it is nearer 50/50.  He told me that there are no pain receptors down there so its uncomfortable at times but certainly not painful.  He ran through everything and I walked into the colonoscopy suite in my gown which was open at the back.  I walked in, jumped on the bed and lay on my side with my knees raised to my chest.  The procedure started and it was a strange sensation - the tube with camera is passed up the back passage - and when it reaches certain parts inflates using CO2 (the sensation is mildly uncomfortable, I would liken it to severe wind the morning after a strong curry), the camera is moved through and the CO2 is released and the discomfort passes.  I chugged on the Gas and air at some parts which did its job but I think I could have maybe got through without it.

 

About fifteen minutes in all seemed to be going well, I asked the doctor if he had seen any piles which he said he hadn't (this did ring an alarm bell at the time) however he said the camera sometimes misses things on the way up but they'll get a view from a different angle on the way back.  I recall him saying the colon looked in really healthy condition and then he began the withdrawal of the scope.  I recall them asking if I wanted to see my Toblerone - being squeamish I hadn't looked at the camera screen but I decided to - and saw part of my bowel in a triangle shape like a Toblerone!  Near the end I was conscious that the doctor had gone slightly quiet and they seemed to be busier, I asked if all was ok and he said 'I've just found something that looks a little mischievous'.  My initial thought was how funny his phraseology was - it sounded like something Stephen Fry would say - then I twigged the meaning and thought hang on that doesn't sound too good! I asked him what he meant and he said 'I'll talk to you in a minute, we have found a small growth low down and just need to take a few biopsies'.

 

Fairly soon after the procedure ended the doctor confirmed to me that he had found a small growth, that it looked cancerous but it also looked early in its development which was positive.  He said they had taken 4 biopsies of it for examination.  He asked if my wife was joining me - and that he said he'd speak to me further when she arrived.  I just remember the room having started fairly jovial with the doctor and the two nurses and a few jokes suddenly felt very subdued.  I felt the nurses were looking at me with sympathy although I'm sure this was my mind.   

 

I remember going back to my room, lying down slightly shell shocked and messaged Julie. "Hun I'm sorry I can't call (there was no signal).  But they've found a small growth low down, its small but they have taken biopsies etc. and will need removing. I need a hug xxx".  Julie sent the perfect reply "Ok hun I'm nearly there. Don't worry and panic xxx" 

 

Soon after Julie arrived along with my lunch which I still wolfed down.  Me and Julie spoke about what had happened and after a while the doctor came in. He confirmed to us that he had found a growth that looked cancerous, it would need removing, that it looked small around 2.5cm (which sounded massive to me at the time!!!), that it looked early in its development and looked treatable.  He said listen if you are going to get Cancer, this is the one to get as it is very treatable if caught early.  He said the biopsies would be analysed but the probably plan would be for me to have CT and MRI scans the following week and then probably surgery the following week.  He said that there was a possibility that the biopsies might come back negative for cancer, however this wouldn't give me the all clear until it had been removed and examined.  He also said that I did have some piles too - cheers! 

 

The doctor went on to say that based on my age on diagnosis and my Mums age when she was diagnosed that I would be sent for genetic testing, and that my  two brothers should also book in for colonoscopies asap.  He said that I would now be transferred to his colleague who would lead any surgery, and he could testify how good he was as he had operated on him previously. 

 

I recall falling to bits at this point as I thought about our beautiful children and  impact of the diagnosis on their innocent happy little lives.  I recall saying how guilty I felt for bringing this on my family but the doctor have me an instant metaphorical kick up the arse saying it's not your fault and the prognosis is positive given it's been caught early and certainly looks treatable.  I cried as he left the room and I thanked him for his excellent care.

 

We left the hospital soon after with me feeling dazed and slightly confused - my Mum was diagnosed at 38 and now I was following in her footsteps of a path I didn’t want to be on.